I'm upset, sad, hurt and on my own again.
I'm upset, sad, hurt and on my own again. Me and my brother fell out but it wasn't mutual he was delibretly trying to annoy me and get an argument out of it. He made a snidey insult about self harming and I just was sick of it. He's constantly made offensive insults about self harming and I was just sick of it. So I poured his drink on his food. He screamed insults at me and threw his can at my face and poured my drink on my food. Maybe I shouldn't have done that. The can has swelled up my eye so it feels like there's something on my eyelid that I can't take off. I just want to know something, if my life is going to carry on like this, I want to know...when does it stop?
My mother was recently interested in getting me into some physical activities and now I can't think of anything better. I'm always that helpless soul who can't hurt a fly, I'm tired of being that person. I can't think of which feeling was worse, the hatred I felt towards my brother or the fact that I couldn't protect myself. If things got out of hand, maybe I'd be lying on that kitchen floor with some badly injured limbs, I'm scared. I might start asking to have dinner in my room, and maybe something plain this time. I can't stand all the casidiyas and spagetti and all these weird foreign foods, I'd rather just have salad. I'm also not thinking about my cat much. My cat has just been so stressful that if my parents insist we get rid of him, I'll let them. I just wanted a cat that can go out do it's own thing and business and occassionally be there at times, not some stupid cat that shits all over his fur and eats more than any human does. And what's really funny is I'm getting the blame for my cat's mistakes even though I didn't pick him or the breed, my brother picked the breed, and my Dad picked the cat. I actually wanted a female cat, but that doesn't matter anyway.
Today I was just sick of my friend Teeghan. I see her for 6 hours a day, 5 days a week, I'm bound to get sick of her. It's just that she really pissed me off today, she is so self centered maybe as self centered as Steph but I just hate people like that. If you don't give a shit about anyone else maybe you should just make your own food, clothes, house and live off by yourself and do things your own way because I'm pretty sure that without anyone listening to you, you wouldn't survive! It's just like one thing after another, and I'm thinking 'Hey, anytime for me here?'
My mother screamed at me a few days ago because I didn't want to sit in a taxi with my brother. He was such an asshole in the morning, and it's like whenever his feet hurt we get a taxi home, he fucking decides when we get a taxi home. Well he can be lazy, I'll walk. I mean maybe I don't like taxis. And I didn't answer my phone for 15 minutes!! And my mum was really pissed off with me. When my brother NEVER brings his phone with him like EVER and I always have my phone on me, but he never gets shouted at OHHHH NOOO he's the fucking favourite child isn't he? I just can't wait for my Dad to come back.
In less than 1 year and 6 months I will be 16; I can't wait...
My mother was recently interested in getting me into some physical activities and now I can't think of anything better. I'm always that helpless soul who can't hurt a fly, I'm tired of being that person. I can't think of which feeling was worse, the hatred I felt towards my brother or the fact that I couldn't protect myself. If things got out of hand, maybe I'd be lying on that kitchen floor with some badly injured limbs, I'm scared. I might start asking to have dinner in my room, and maybe something plain this time. I can't stand all the casidiyas and spagetti and all these weird foreign foods, I'd rather just have salad. I'm also not thinking about my cat much. My cat has just been so stressful that if my parents insist we get rid of him, I'll let them. I just wanted a cat that can go out do it's own thing and business and occassionally be there at times, not some stupid cat that shits all over his fur and eats more than any human does. And what's really funny is I'm getting the blame for my cat's mistakes even though I didn't pick him or the breed, my brother picked the breed, and my Dad picked the cat. I actually wanted a female cat, but that doesn't matter anyway.
Today I was just sick of my friend Teeghan. I see her for 6 hours a day, 5 days a week, I'm bound to get sick of her. It's just that she really pissed me off today, she is so self centered maybe as self centered as Steph but I just hate people like that. If you don't give a shit about anyone else maybe you should just make your own food, clothes, house and live off by yourself and do things your own way because I'm pretty sure that without anyone listening to you, you wouldn't survive! It's just like one thing after another, and I'm thinking 'Hey, anytime for me here?'
My mother screamed at me a few days ago because I didn't want to sit in a taxi with my brother. He was such an asshole in the morning, and it's like whenever his feet hurt we get a taxi home, he fucking decides when we get a taxi home. Well he can be lazy, I'll walk. I mean maybe I don't like taxis. And I didn't answer my phone for 15 minutes!! And my mum was really pissed off with me. When my brother NEVER brings his phone with him like EVER and I always have my phone on me, but he never gets shouted at OHHHH NOOO he's the fucking favourite child isn't he? I just can't wait for my Dad to come back.
In less than 1 year and 6 months I will be 16; I can't wait...
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